“Mommy, you should give it to me because I’m fabulous!” –Naya Patel
I don’t even remember what we were talking about or what she was asking for; all I could think as she said this was “that’s right girlfriend, Preach!”
Of course my daughter should be growing up knowing she’s fabulous; that she deserves the good things in life; that birds and mice come and get her ready with ribbons of love in the morning. Ok the last part is obviously a Cinderella fairytale, but why not.
I grew up unsure of how good I was. I grew up questioning every decision I made, sometimes 3-4 times. Constantly worrying about what people thought of me and never speaking up for myself. As a result I had a massive fear of confrontation.
It took me years to put my fears aside, to finally know my worth, and speak up more. I realized I actually love debates, and am unafraid to give my opinion on a subject, assertively and confidently…now, after all these years.
I am so grateful that my daughter knows who she is from the time she was born. My heart smiles thinking about all the years she’ll save trying to find herself, her worth, her purpose. I have faith I will be able to preserve this beautiful self-awareness in her, because I believe I can honor my own self-worth, self-acceptance and self-confidence!
In the end, we are all wild hearted beings that just want to let loose, be free, fun and fabulous! Here’s 3 ways we all can all preserve our wild hearts and shine the light for others!
1. Saying “YES”
Sounds simple doesn’t it, but for some reason “No” is usually the first to come out. Maybe because we just react, rather than taking a deep breath and asking, “heck why not?”
In our house, tent parties in our bedroom, painting with our hands, dance parties on kitchen counters, and riding our bikes around the house on rainy days, would never happen, if I hadn’t said Yes!
Saying yes, has been… FUN! Like literally I have a fantastic time. Saying yes has also calmed my controlling mind and freed me from the pressure of being “perfect.” The pressure of keeping them protected and clean, having good manners and being… tame.
I’m trying to keep them TAME!?! When all I want to do is run out in the rain and dance, to jump in the swimming pool fully clothed, to have a food fight…in a park (there are some things I still won’t allow in the house 😉
Saying yes, makes my wild heart soar!
2. Speaking with Respect
Sometimes my girls whine and nag, and repeat! On my already tired days, I yearn so bad for peace and quiet and may even find myself wanting to scream “BE QUIETTTT!!!”
Then I take a deep breath and realize, if my best friend was doing this what would I say to her. I’d say, “Hey girl, I’m beat. I really just wanna chillax. And from all the sounds you’re making, it seems like your day has been pretty exhausting too. So lets find something we can do quietly, together. “ (ok the last part is reserved for my kids to understand, to my bff I’d say “lets just make like celery and veg out ;))
This response puts me in a peaceful state of being and allows me to know my own potential; I can be calm and not bitchy? This logical reaction is simple and yet enormously affects my self-respect and respect for others.
When people feel respected, they feel supported and capable of doing things they never thought possible. Capable of commanding a room. Capable of rock climbing up the highest mountain. Capable of speaking in front of 1000 people.
If you can’t speak with respect on the simple things, then how do you expect to do it on the bigger issues.
3. Come Back to Love
When all else fails, remember to come back to telling myself and everyone I care for, how much I genuinely love them. Sounds simple enough.
However, the other day the most horrible thing happened. I was putting my babies to bed, and realized I hadn’t REALLY hugged them all day
Sure, we say “I love you” and kiss them, when they go to school, or when we leave for work. I mean to really take the time to look at them and hug them, and make them feel like you love them to the moon and back 8 times over.
Telling them “I am the luckiest person in the world that they chose me as their momma.” Telling them “I am wonderfully free because, I learned it by watching you.” In telling them, I am reminding myself, I am loved, I am grateful, I am joy, and that I can always come back to love!
Of course these things aren’t easy to do, and take it from me, your ego will fight you every step of the way, but they are simple. Simple, yet profound. A simple yes can make a person feel fabulous, A calm response can make a person feel respected. Words of gratitude or hugs and cuddles can make a person feel loved…sometimes that person is you. A wild hearted, untamed soul, needing to take flight!